Artist Confessions
A place for artists and art appreciators! Share your woes, triumphs, obsessions and aggressions.

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SUBMIT A CONFESSION
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Mascot & avatar by artistincompre
sidebar by Horchata

I have no Idea…

I don’t know. Even with tablet I own for years (genius tablet, idk what type), and my (rather) good adaptation to even unusual software (I use PS, not that unusual actually). I still feel disconnected with my drawing. And the result is bad,idk am I just stupid or my tablet is not good. Though I’m a traditional artist, but why I see first trials of trad artists to draw digital are always better.

Digital messy sketch by me

tags » submission ·
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So I’m not a great artist, but decent? Yes. Good? I think a growing artist is never good enough. People are willing to buy from me at relatively decent prices. 10 hours of my time should be worth around 10 hours of someone else doing work just as hard as, shouldn’t it?

Yet people who think like this person still exist, that paying virtual currency for art is okay but it’s “not fair” to pay artists real money. This person is speaking in regards to RL commissions.

What I told her, a comment she deleted from her profile page, was essentially that people’s time is worth money, and that money cannot always be replaced by virtual currencies. I said that it’s alright if she doesn’t feel my art is worth that much money. She doesn’t even need to like my art, but after asking me to make an exception and do non RL commission for her when I told her that I’m not doing virtual commissions because I need to pay bills, she said these things,

I’d rather her just told me “I can’t afford it” or make some sort of other excuse that would be reasonably polite. I’ve done my best to explain my point to her, as did two others. No results.

Does this fall under #nohopeformankind or is this just a rogue ignoramus running her mouth?

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Admin Roster thus far:

 I want the community to be aware that these are the choices I’m making. I’m just making you guys aware before I do it so its not a newsflash. I’ll be adding them Sunday the 20th. I added them because of their experience doin this. Su was also up voted most by the community so it wasn’t my choice. 

1) Valentine Clementine

She’s been on dA as itachisraven for just about 5 years and FA for just under 3 under sillystrings. She’s also the admin of Palette time so I would like her to help me with the main AC blog. 

"Hey everyone! I’m Val, and I think it would be really great to help out here on AC.

I’ve been on DA for just under five years and on FA for a little under 3 and I’ve also been here on tumblr for a good while.

I’d really love to help out because I think this is a wonderful community, but even still a lot of this has become too much for Horchata. I couldn’t stand to see how much stress she was under, especially after all that has happened in the past few weeks or so, and I really wanted to reach out and help.

I wanna help to continue to keep AC a great place, just as Horchata turned it into, so I hope I can do that for all of you!”

2) Su (That link is very NSFW)

Been on dA for 11+ years under gokai-chibi. I’d like her to help me with Pics4AC and Promo AC.

Being as I love AC and would love to see it grow under a more positive light this time around, I would be more then happy to help.”

As far as ASH goes, I have Sieste helping me with it. I’ve moved around things on AC so that its less cluttered and ASH has the critiques, tutorials, and other-such. ASH link. 

tags » acaa ·
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I think about this for a very long time now, and to be honest it terrifies me. I realized that maybe art isn’t what I want to do after all. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking about giving up art, I’m talking about stopping my art studies and do something else. I’m currently in art school that prepares people to 3D animation jobs, game art in general (chara-design, concept artist, etc) or visual effects. Now, this school is very great, teachers are skilled and I feel very happy to be there… or I used to. In this school, I realized there was something I lacked : interest. You know, my classmates spend all their free time drawing in order to improve, they never do their homework last minute, they talk about the latest animation movie they saw, or the exhibition they visited… but I don’t share this mentality at all. I don’t really care for the latest movies, I don’t really care for exhibitions, which is a shame, I know… but I really feel like I’m out of place here, I don’t belong here. Sure, I love to draw, but I guess it’s not what I want to do with my life. I love to contribute to my favorite fandoms and all, but with my mentality, I’m pretty sure I am not made of what a good animator/game designer/chara-designer/etc is. For example, I had like 4 really long assignments to do these past weeks (fill a 120-pages sketchbook, make an hyperrealist portrait of Darth Vader, etc) and the deadline is in three days. I see my classmates on Facebook talking about their own homework, how they did this, how they did that, what could they do to improve their portrait… and I’m here with my 5 pages filled sketchbook and my half-finished portrait (among other things of course). You may call it laziness, and sure, it’s true, but I think it’s also more akin to… disinterest. I am very motivated to draw for myself and everything’s fine, but when I am asked to do something that bores me, it becomes very hard to focus and sometimes, I don’t even start it at all. And you can understand why this is a very big problem in the job I want(ed) to do. Drawing as a hobby is fine, but I think that trying to make it my job was my greatest mistake. I simply don’t have the mentality, the motivation, the skill and the interest required to do it. Because of all this, I don’t even know if I’ll pass this year, and I’m actually getting really worried. Not only I lack motivation, but I honestly can’t say I’m the most skillful person among my classmates, which is why I’m pretty sure I won’t pass this year, unless I kick my own ass and start to handle this properly.

But the thing is, with this realization, I’m not even sure if I want to pass and continue in art school. I think that sometimes, you have to accept that you’re simply not fit for what you thought you wanted to do. I spent two years in art school now, at first I thought it was a dream come true, I wanted to do my best, to improve and to find a job in video game (I’m not even sure what I’d like to do precisely), but now… I feel terrible for my parents, because I am very lucky that they support me even though they think art is not a good career choice. However, they’d like to see me finish my studies soon without wasting time or skipping a year, and if I tell them now that I want to quit, I’m sure they will tell me I already lost enough years (I’m 21 years old, long story short, at 19 years old I was in business and management school, didn’t like it. 20 years old, I was in another art school, didn’t go well. 21 years old, I’m currently in this very great art school but it made me realize that maybe I wasn’t made for this job) and they won’t want to see me start over AGAIN. The fact that my big sister had a smooth career path without ever straying once doesn’t help. I perfectly understand how they feel, and that’s why I feel so miserable at the moment, because I know it’s my fault I am so indecisive and waste my own time. But that’s a fact : I like to draw, I’d love to improve, but not in a professional way. I want to do it as a hobby.

I can’t even say that I have a talent for drawing, however if I had to pick my one true talent, I would say it’s taking care of others. Especially kids and adolescents. Truth be told, I just love them. I also have experience with teaching them. I’m thinking about it for a very long time now and started to wonder if I could not be a teacher. From preschool to elementary school. I know, it might seem like I’m choosing this job on a whim, but the scary thing is, I can imagine myself being a teacher way more than being an artist in games. Once again, I’m very indecisive. Is this really what I want to do ? Would I pass the school exams ? What if I regret it later ? What if I miss art ? This is the most terrifying thought to me : missing art, and regretting it all. However, the only thing I’m sure of is that I would be a way better teacher than the professional artist I could ever dream to be. I know it won’t be all sunshine and rainbows, there is no such job like that, but this is what I feel is best for me. Of course, I could be mistaken (after all, I thought for almost two years now that I wanted to be a professional artist), and this is what I’m afraid of.

So yeah, here’s my story. I feel very worried and scared at the moment, I don’t know what I should do, I don’t know if I should even bother with my homework at artschool anymore, I don’t know how to deal with my parents’ reaction (they will surely pressure me into passing this year and continue in art school), I feel lost. But it feels good to get this off my chest, because I kept it bottled up for too long now. Thanks for reading this, and for those who didn’t feel like reading it all, here’s a TL ; DR

TL ; DR : wasted 2 years, currently in art school but realized I love art as an hobby and not as a future job. Would like to switch to a different sector entirely : preschool and elementary school teacher. Afraid of what will happen in the future, of regretting leaving art school, of parents’ reaction and scared of wasting even more years. What should I do ?

Doodle by me

sisselxsoleil

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(stock photo from http://www.123rf.com/photo_22877493_side-view-of-caucasian-woman-contemplating-colorful-paintings-displayed-in-front-of-her.html)

I’m graduating college soon(yay!) and I really regret not going to more art shows, gallery/show openings, artists talks, and other art events. I know I can still go to these events but there is something about being a part of it while in art school that I feel would have been more beneficial to me- like creating contacts, meeting new friends/people, and learning a little more about galleries and the local art scene. There were so many great shows that I wanted to go to but skipped out on for various reasons. Once I graduate I want to make it a point to go to these events more regularly, I feel I’m doing myself a disservice if I don’t.  

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Cash Clock - Online Stopwatch

http://art-self-help.tumblr.com/post/83256025393/

First post on ASH! 

tags » ash · admin l ·
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Webcomics?

Can someone help me? Where is a good place to start a webcomic for free?

tags » submission · question ·
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As an art student, I sometimes wish that every piece of art I create, didn’t have to be some high piece of conceptual art that critiques society (as an example). Don’t get me wrong, they can be very good but my teachers push for it all the time. It just feels unnecessary sometimes, like I’m randomly throwing “super deep meaning”, (which you may not be able to understand as it goes with conceptual art), onto a piece of art when there really was no need for it or intention in the first place. 

image Fountain by Duchamp

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Picture has nothing to do with confession.

I, for one, have to say that I really just like to draw without caring what others thought. It’s an enjoyable pass-time hobby and it does feel good to complete something even when you feel so damn lazy.

But at the same time, I really do want to have many people recognize me and get positive feedback about the art I do yet somehow, I feel like I’m doing something wrong. Whenever I’m on DeviantArt, I see some of my friends or strangers getting so much feedback, no matter how long it’s been since they posted anything or how long it’s been since they’ve talked to anyone, yet people still come to them without much of a problem.

But whatever I do, fanart or original, whether I submit to groups or not, it just doesn’t seem to work at all. I even try to be friendly with people and I generally am friendly, as much as I can anyway. It’s such a terrible feeling and it kind of dampens my mood whenever that happens, no matter how much I try to convince myself it’s probably just my imagination and that art isn’t just about trying to get anybody’s attention.

This honestly makes me think people just…. don’t like me at all, for no reason whatsoever. And it’s not even funny, any time someone mentions my name, a link to my DeviantArt/Youtube/anything, nobody seems to care yet when someone else is mentioned, there’s the flood of comments coming in.

Am I really that bad that most people just generally and visibly ignore me?

tags » submission · worries · angst · deviantart ·
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